I never thought it would happen but Mike Patton’s rocking teenage combo finally turned up in Glasgow, albeit in modified form as drummer, Dave Lombardo was unavailable. Still it was a double delight to see former Zappa drummer, Terry Bozzio, behind the kit as stand-in.

I arrived towards the end of the supporting set provided by Guapo. Contrary to my previous, rather ambivalent, review Guapo were firing on all cylinders, perhaps due to the energy from packed house of amped up metalheads. Where they had previously seemed intimidating and a little distant, tonight they boiled with energy. They delivered the closing sections of their Five Suns album with vigour and Phantom of the Opera, gothic theatrics.

If Guapo are theatrical, Fantomas come straight out shlock-horror exploitation cinema. Roger Corman couldn’t have put together a more nefarious looking crew. With Mike Patton as Vincent Price, all debonair charm and a devilish twinkle in his eye and guitarist Buzz Osborne as the mad axeman with hair like The Simpsons’ Sideshow Bob.

The music too is like something out of a movie, a hammer house of horror: Nothing is as it seems; melodies materialise then vaporise instantly, like ghosts; riffs coalesce out of the chaos increasing in intensity before winking out of existence as if the staircase you were climbing suddenly flattened out leaving you sliding towards your doom on a bed of spikes; ambient moments of quiet dissolve into choruses of hideous screaming like a trapdoor opening beneath your feet; and the industrial drum kit- behind which Bozzio is only partially visible as a cyborg welded to his vast artillery of percussive devices – turns out to be a giant, medieval contraption, with a pendulum sending a scything blade to decapitate you.

All of this is played out with tracks from all four Fantomas albums, jumbled up and juxtaposed even more randomly than in their original incarnations. Patton is the guide to this hell. He welcomes you with a grin and a knowing wink whilst leading you your doom in an iron maiden. Stationed behind a tabletop strewn with fx pedals, samplers, cables and assorted voice enhancing devices he shrieks, gibbers and, once in a while, even sings as the band thread their way note perfectly (except on one occasion) through the screeching about turns and abrupt changes.

This music, abstract and random as it may sound, is tightly arranged and requires precision playing to get it right. Bozzio, Osborne and Dunn play with laser beam focus as if navigating through a minefield. Bozzio, reading his parts, adds new colour and shade to the proceedings. A distinct change from Lombardo’s hammering attack though with no less energy or volume. His trademark rolling fills and elegant, melodic finesse are completely suited to Patton’s chaotic stew and I’ll warrant this music is as complex as anything he played in the Zappa band. The net result of all this complexity and focus is that, while there’s loads going on in your ears, there isn’t so much to see. The whole band are resolutely rooted to their respective spots, manfully playing like their lives depend on it. The music goes in all directions and none at the same time. It absolutely refuses to resolve into anything like a straight rhythm or melody which is somewhat frustrating for the metal heads who are primed and, dare I say it, mosh-ready. Heads and shoulders bob at the mere semblance of a riff but full on head shaking never breaks out as Patton’s music resolutely defies convention.

It would be impossible to keep up the energy for a long time and, as if genetically programmed to self-destruct, the gig winds up after an hour exactly. There’s no feeling of being short-changed though. Fantomas’ music is delivered in such dense, compressed form, more than an hour’s exposure would probably be toxic.

Later, as you start to decode the immense amount of information you just downloaded, you may be reminded of the puzzle box from Hellraiser. Just as you think you’ve fathomed Fantomas’ music, you feel a chill down your spine and hear a distant, lugubrious guffawing…